LUSER(8)						 LUSER(8)

NAME
       luser  -  process to control the clueless  individuals who
       (mis)use computer systems, peripheral devices  and  system
       administrators. Word play on "loser" and "user".

SYNOPSIS
       luser [-d] [-g<level>] [-s] <lusername>

DESCRIPTION
       luser  is  the primary tool a system administrator uses to
       manage end-user requests. This powerful tool can  actually
       cause  the  specified user to perform actions as specified
       by the flags.

       With no flags, luser deletes every running  process  owned
       by the specified <lusername>.

OPTIONS
       -d     Disk reclamation mode. Remove all files in the home
	      directory of <lusername>.

       -g<level>
	      Grovel mode. Causes the specified luser to make  an
	      act  of  contrition  to the sysadmin for past sins.
	      The <level> indicates the severity of  the  contri-
	      tion:

       LEVEL

       0      User  makes a sincere apology and promises to never
	      do it again.

       1      User buys sysadmin a large quantity  of  sysadmin's
	      favorite beverage.

       2      User  signs over ownership of his/her car to sysad-
	      min.

       3      User resigns from the company after writing a  long
	      letter of apology detailing his/her failings.

       4      User  commits  ritual suicide by sucking on a power
	      strip and grounding himself to a conduit.

NOTES
       Sysadmins are encouraged to use the -s option as a way  to
       smarten	up  the  world's  user base. Use the -g option at
       level 4 outside the confines of the machine room. The more
       lusers that witness the act, the better.

SEE ALSO
       sysadmin(1)

BUGS
       Occasionally,  the  luser may survive the effects of luser
       -g4.  In that event, a second invocation  of  the  command
       will usually prove to be fatal.

HISTORY
       Written by Eric L. Pederson <eric@bofh.org.uk>.

			25 September 1995